Guest Blog: How to Describe an Estranged Relative Showing Up

Great Guest Blog by Angela Ackerman  (Top photo from Elva's file. 😎😏)

Conflict Thesaurus Entry: An Estranged Relative Showing Up

Posted on April 25, 2020 by ANGELA ACKERMAN

Conflict is very often the magic sauce for generating tension and turning a ho-hum story into one that rivets readers. As such, every scene should contain a struggle of some kind. Maybe it’s an internal tug-of-war having to do with difficult decisions, morals, or temptations. Or it possibly could come from an external source—other characters, unfortunate circumstances, or the force of nature itself.

It’s our hope that this thesaurus will help you come up with meaningful and fitting conflict options for your stories. Think about what your character wants and how best to block them, then choose a source of conflict that will ramp up the tension in each scene.

Conflict: An Estranged Relative Showing Up

Category: Power struggles, relationship friction, duty and responsibilities, loss of control, ego

Examples:
An estranged parent appearing at the door unannounced
Falling out with a cousin and years later they call to ask for help
An estranged parent showing up at the hospital to meet their grandchild
A sibling that has been out of the character’s life for years in a bind asking for money
A relative banned from the character’s wedding showing up anyway
Feuding relatives showing up at a loved one’s funeral, wake, or will-reading
A child with an out-of-control addiction showing up because they’re in trouble

Minor Complications:
Anger causing rash behavior and words that can’t be taken back
Embarrassment, especially if the person shows up drunk, hungover, or behaves inappropriately in front of others
Having to navigate uncomfortable questions if the character has lied about the person in some way (that they are dead, or in a care facility, etc.)
Losing the esteem of others (the person behaving badly around colleagues, for example)
Exposing loved ones to a toxic person
The estranged relative catering to the character’s partner or child in hopes it will help them get what they want

Potentially Disastrous Results:
Being suckered into believing they have changed only to find they have not
A child building a relationship with their grandparent only to be later abandoned
The character’s hard-won esteem crashing due to gas-lighting
The character falling back into dysfunctional habits they worked hard to shake
Anger escalating to violence, and the police are called
Family drama ruining an important event (a wedding reception, graduation, etc.)
Discovering money or items are missing after this person’s arrival
The person’s arrival touching off a feud where relatives all takes sides
The estranged member causing friction in their marriage
People discovering the character’s past as they know it is a lie

Possible Internal Struggles (Inner Conflict):
Wanting approval still and so feeling weak for needing it
Struggling to not let one’s own “ugly side” take over due to unresolved anger
Wanting to resolve things but knowing it is impossible
Wanting to tell loved ones the truth behind the rift but being unable to return to the source of hurt
Anxiety over traits the character has in common with the estranged individual
Questioning their memory (especially if gas-lighting was a factor)

People Who Could Be Negatively Affected: the character themselves, loved ones (especially vulnerable ones like children or elderly relatives who could be taken advantage of)

Resulting Emotions: anger, anxiety, appalled, betrayed, bitterness, certainty, conflicted, confusion, contempt, defensiveness, defiant, disgust, disillusionment, dread, emasculated, embarrassment, flustered, frustration, grief, guilt, hatred, homesick, hopefulness, humiliation, hurt, insecurity, longing, neglected, rage, regret, reluctance, remorse, resentment, resignation, sadness, schadenfreude, scorn, self-loathing, self-pity, shame, shock, skepticism, suspicion, vengeful, vindicated, vulnerability, worthlessness

Personality Flaws that May Make the Situation Worse: abrasive, addictive, callous, confrontational, forgetful, hypocritical, indecisive, martyr, needy, perfectionist, subservient, timid, violent, volatile, weak-willed

Positive Outcomes: 
If both parties regret the past, perhaps a more functional future can be achieved through forgiveness and accountability
Sometimes a person needs closure. Seeing the person again and knowing they haven’t changed may allow the character to move on.
If the character needed information (say on a birth parent to be able to fill out accurate health histories for their child), it is possible they can finally get it even if that is the only positive of the person returning.

If you’re interested in other conflict options, you can find them here.

Need More Descriptive Help?

While this conflict thesaurus is still being developed, the rest of our descriptive collection (15 unique thesauri and growing) is available at our main site, One Stop for Writers.

Swing by and check out the video walkthrough, and then give our Free Trial a spin.

About ANGELA ACKERMAN

Angela is a writing coach, international speaker, and bestselling author who loves to travel, teach, empower writers, and pay-it-forward. She also is a founder of One Stop For Writers, an online library packed with powerful tools to help writers elevate their storytelling.

View all posts by ANGELA ACKERMAN →

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Thanks for stopping by. Hope you enjoyed Angela's great article. I'm saving it for my file.  Have you had an estranged relative show back up? How did you handle it? Please leave your comment and share.

Elva 

Elva Cobb Martin is 2020 President of the SC Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College.  She has three inspirational novels published, Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and two historical romances, In a Pirate’s Debt, and Marisol, Book 1 in a new Charleston Brides series for  Wild Heart Books. All three novels have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction.

Link to all her books: http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

A Breakdown of Fiction Genres

by Elva Cobb Martin

For an author, genre is a style or category that controls what you write and how you write it. It is the blueprint for various types of stories.

Each genre has rules to follow and there can be sub-genres within genres. 

Genres are great because they fulfill reader  expectations. Like me, you probably buy certain books because you've enjoyed similar stories in the past.

Here is my simple breakdown of some popular fictional genres to help me keep them straight. You may know of others or group them differently.

Each genre has its own "blueprint" an author needs to research before writing in that category.

I will start my list with the two forever best-selling genres as far as I know-- Romance and Mystery,which are also my favorites.

1. Romance - stories about relationships between two people who fall in love. There are many sub-genres like Romantic Suspense, Historical Romance (with many period sub genres), Paranormal Romance. Most people love a love story!

2. Mystery/Crime/Suspense/Thriller - I lumped a lot of types in this one. Includes the "whodunits." There are many sub-genres like Police Procedural, Suspense/Thriller, Legal Thriller, Medical Thriller, Cozy Mystery.  Many people, including me, like to solve a mystery!

3. Action Adventure - This story puts the protagonist in physical danger with thrilling near misses and daring feats. It is fast-paced.

4. Speculative Fiction - These stories are created in worlds unlike our real world in certain important ways. They can overlap in science fiction, supernatural fiction, fantasy fiction, apocalyptic fiction.

5.  Young Adult - these are written, published and marketed to adolescent and young adults probably between the ages of 12-18. The stories can cross into fantasy and science fiction genres.

6. Women's Fiction - These plots are characterized by female central characters who face challenges and crises that have a direct relationship with gender.

7. Historical - These fictional stories take place against factual historical backdrops. Historical figures may be portrayed as fictional characters. Family sagas might be a sub genre.

8. Westerns - These books are specifically set in the old American West. Plot lines include survival, romance and adventure, and can include cowboys, mountain men, Indians, miners.

9. Horror/Paranormal/Ghost - These are high-pitched scary stories involving pursuit and escape. Occult is a sub genre.

10. Literary Fiction -This genre focuses on the human condition and is more concerned with the inner lives of characters and themes than plot. Some say this genre is hard to sell and continues to decline.

Thank you for stopping by. I bet you have another fiction genre to add somewhere in my list! Please leave your comment and  do share this blog by clicking on the small icons below.

Have a blessed, safe, July 4th!

Elva 

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels published with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. She has indie published a Bible study on the  believer's authority in Christ, Power Over Satan. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin

 Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon:http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

Guest Post: Successful Editing Summed Up in a Single Principle

Successful Editing Summed Up in a Single Principle— Err on the Side of Outrageous Posted: 01 Dec 2016 07:00 AM PST by Edie Melson Writers tend to fall into two distinct groups, those who prefer to write and those who prefer to rewrite—also known as editing. I fall into the latter group. I can’t help it. I just love the process of editing. It doesn’t really matter if I’m editing someone else, or my own manuscript. To me, it’s a fulfilling task of taking something good and making it into something great. But the path of getting from good to great can be a difficult one, unless you follow this single principle. I stumbled upon it early in my writing journey and it’s served me well, no matter what type of editing situation I’m in. So what is it that makes for successful editing?  Err on the side of outrageous I can see the puzzled looks from here. But bear with me as I explain. Saying things the way they’ve always been said is, at best, boring and at worst, a cliché. So when you’re going back over what’s been written, look for something new…something different…something OUTRAGEOUS! Places to Plug-in the Outrageous Verbs—first, get rid of the passive verbs that dot the landscape of a first draft. Search for was and were, and be and been. Now go for action. And don’t just stick with boring action, search for something that zings the senses of your readers. For instance, instead of this sentence: He moved across the busy street to reach his beloved’s side. Try something like this: He darted across the street, zigging and zagging toward the one who held his reason for living. Comparisons—we do want our comparisons to make sense to our readers, but within those parameters, be brave and dare to walk on the path of outrageous. For instance, instead of this sentence: Her heart pounded like a bass drum as she watched for her love dart through the traffic of the busy street. Try something like this: He darted across the street, and the staccato beat of her heart beat punctuated each of steps that brought him closer to her embrace. Senses—in fiction, as well as creative nonfiction, all scenes should include the five senses. Look for ways to include the senses that also capture the setting or the character’s emotions. Do you want to give us the essence of a hot summer’s evening in the south? Instead of the cool breeze that kisses cheeks and ruffles hair, what if it carried the smoky taste of the grill from the house next door. Perhaps it clogs your throat with the chemical taste of a mosquito truck that just finished its rounds. Perhaps the delicate lace under a brides fingers promised an enclosing mesh of steel, instead of the soft promise of two lives knitted together? These are the things to look for as you take a manuscript from good to great. Clichés—this is a way of saying something that has become so common place it’s almost invisible. The first few drafts of any manuscript often contain clichés because they’re a good way for the writer to capture the essence of what she wants to convey. Again, good, not great. But the editing phase is the time to tweak those ho-hum sayings and make them great. Sometimes it’s nothing more than turning them on their head. Your reader thinks you’re headed in one direction and at the last moment you dodge and it’s something original. For example, instead of this cliché: She was decked out head to toe. Try something like this: She was decked out toes to nose. The opportunities for outrageous are plentiful at this stage in the writing process. It’s the act of looking for opportunities to surprise and delight your readers that makes them appear. What about you? Have you been surprised by an author’s choice of phrase or word? Have you found a new way to say something common-place? Now isn’t the time to be shy. Share your thoughts in the comments section below. And don’t forget to join the conversation! Blessings, Edie Edie Melson is the author of numerous books, as well as a freelance writer and editor. Her blog, The Write Conversation, reaches thousands each month. She’s the co-director of the Blue Ridge Mountains ChristianWriters Conference and the Social Media Mentor at My Book Therapy. She’s also the Military Family Blogger at Guideposts. Com, Social Media Director for SouthernWriters Magazine and the Senior Editor for NovelRocket.com. Connect with her on Twitter and Facebook. Don't miss her new book