Editing Your Novel - Part 3 Misused, Overused, & Sticky Words

By Elva Cobb Martin

Editing a novel is a big job, but don't let it stress you. We've got a lot more help available today than a quill! 

In Part 1 we first strongly suggested you spend quality time planning your novel and finish your first draft before doing a lot of editing. And we reviewed the 10-Part steps to planning your novel that I've covered in earlier blogs starting in July, 2017. Go here to find the first step to planning your novel: http://bit.ly/2zPmZa1. 

In Part 2 we talked about a great editing program and covered ProWritingAid's "The Writing Style Report." This edit highlights several areas of writing that should be revised to improve readability, including passive voice, overuse of adverbs, repeated sentence starts, hidden verbs, unneeded words, and much more. And I gave examples from my wip.

Today, we continue with some of the great edits Pro-WritingAid.com will do for your manuscript.

The Grammar Report 
This works like the spelling and grammar checks in a word processor but does more. It makes sure the structure, punctuation and tense are correct. It will also check misuse of words like "adverse" for "averse" or "clinch" for "clench."

The Overused Word Report --covers a lot.
Overused words fall into five main categories:
1) Too Wishy-Washy
2) Telling Rather than Showing
3) Weak words/verbs dependent on intensifiers vs. stronger                     words/verbs.
       Examples: very hot vs. suffocating, 
                       walked vs. strode, marched, scrambled, tottered
                        strong voice vs. husky, strident, guttural
4) Non-Specific words 
5) Awkward Sentences

The Sticky Sentence Report--this is a fun one.
A sticky sentence is one that is full of glue words like in, of, on, the, at, if, that, then, over, in order, what, some.
   Example: John walked over into the backyard of the school in order to see if there was a new bicycle that he could use in his class.  (27 words)
   Corrected: John checked the school backyard for a new bicycle to use in class. (14 words)

Example from my historical romance wip, Marisol.

Cloaked in the early morning shadows of the cemetery, Marisol watched Captain Becket place flowers on his wife’s grave. He had finally returned from his long trip to England the night before, and the welcome sight of him caused her heart to hammer so hard she feared he might hear. His bronzed face, thick arms and chest befitted a seaman’s demeanor. Nothing remained to hint he’d once been the minister of the small rock church beyond the graveyard. How had a man of the clergy become what some might call a pirate?  

Ethan turned and she shrank behind a monument.

“Marisol.” His deep voice rooted her bare feet in the dew-laden grass.

He strode toward her. His heavy booted step, and the jangling of his sword and pistols startled birds into flight. He stopped a yard from her. “I’m glad you followed me. “I have some good news to tell you.”

Trembling, she looked up into his bearded face and startling grey eyes. 

First sentence corrected: How had a pastor become a pirate?

Second sentence corrected: "I have good news." 

Thanks for stopping by. Are these editing tips helping you? Please share on your social media by clicking on the small icons below.
  
Blessings,
Elva Martin

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels published with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. She has indie published a Bible study on Amazon, Power Over Satan, on the  believer's authority in Christ. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin    

 Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon:http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

Editing Your Novel - Part 2 A Great Editing Software

by Elva Cobb Martin

Editing a novel is a big undertaking. I highly recommend ProWritingAid, a world-class editing software, that really tackles this job with gusto. It's like having your favorite editor standing over your shoulder pointing out things you need to change, and giving you options. This program can work right in your Microsoft documents. At the end of this blog I will give you a discount link to this software, if you decide you're interested.

Today I want to start giving you a list of the 20-plus major items this software will help edit in your novel. I'll even give you examples from my own novel as I edited using the program.

First, the Writing Style Report: This highlights several areas of writing that should be revised to improve readability, including passive voice, overuse of adverbs, repeated sentence starts, hidden verbs, unneeded words, and much more. Isn't that a bunch of things that need checking? And this is just the Style Report.

Here's a sample with the editing marks of the Writing Style Report from the first draft of my work-in-progress (wip) Marisol, a Christian historical romance.

In his merchant office above the dock, Ethan checked off all the cargo goods on his accounting sheet that Tim had left for him. The sugar, tobacco, cacao and casks of rum from Jamaica had been delivered to the buyers and at a good price. He’d made a neat profit on this merchant trip. Not to mention the gold they had plundered from the captured Spanish galleon carrying Marisol and the other indentured servants. He still had quite a few pieces of eight and nuggets to add to his strongbox besides the coin he paid for Marisol’s indenture paper. As usual, when the Spaniards ran up the white flag and surrendered under his cannons, he ordered the crew to take the gold and let the ship go free. They had been surprised to find indentured servants aboard.

While Ethan worked with the figures in his accounting book, and stashed the gold in his secret place, one thought kept fluttering across his mind. What kind of woman would have the courage or the know-how to stop a snake with only her boot? What other secrets did this woman have under that mane of shining black hair?

(Now I see I need to change the passive voice in the two purple sentences.)

Here's another sample showing unneeded words:

Ethan needed to go before recollections of his happy years with Olivia at the little church brought the familiar pain and drought to his soul. He picked up the reins. “Sir, I need to be getting home before dark. I do wish you and your family my very best. And do drop by to see the new governess I found for our Joshua. I believe you’ll like her.

You can check out ProWritingAid.com and get a free sample of your work edited. 

Here's a link for a discount, I think will still work, if you decide you would like to purchase the software: https://prowritingaid.com/en/App/Purchase?rf=10&mafid=647213

Thanks for stopping by. I'll continue these editing tips next time. Please share this blog on your social media by clicking on the small icons below.

Blessings.
Elva

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels published with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. She has indie published a Bible study on Amazon, Power Over Satan, on the  believer's authority in Christ. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin    

 Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon:http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

Editing Your Novel - Part 1 Finish First Draft

by Elva Cobb Martin

Good editing is like going through a gate to an exciting, better book. Here I am entering a Georgetown,SC, rice plantation. I refused to let the rain hinder my tour or photos.

How do you write your novel? Where does editing come in?

For me, the real editing begins after the first draft. 

I write the first draft mainly to get the plot points down, tell the story, hit the major scenes I've already planned. I work hard and fast getting my opening set up, hitting important scenes in the middle, and writing the major ending scenes, including the black moment and the HEA. 

If I try to do a lot of editing in the first draft, I may never get to THE END. I know folks, like me earlier, who struggle years trying to write that "novel." But it takes so long if you try editing as you go along, for example, editing what you wrote yesterday before going on today. Trust me, that's going up the ladder backwards. 

When I finish that first draft, I might have 45,000-50,000 words, but will need 60,000-80,000 words for the final draft, according to what a publisher I've queried might ask for.

Reviewing, here's what works for me in novel writing to finish that first draft:

1) I spend quality time planning that first draft. Planning your novel is described in my 10-part series earlier in this blog. Find Part 1 here http://bit.ly/2zPmZa1. 

Here's the list of the other 9 parts in the archives:

Part 2 -  Premise
Part 3 -  Pitches and Book Tags
Part 4 -  Characterization Special -Dancing Horse & Heroine
Part 5 -  Deep Heroine Characterization
Part 6 -  Hero Characterization
Part 7 -  Secondary Characters
Part 8 -  Outlining
Part 9 -  Choosing the best opening scene
Part 10 - The Fiction Proposal

So don't fudge on your novel planning. It will help that first draft be a fast birthing! I've learned since writing that series that making a time line of historical events to cover my historical series will be a great help. 

So you finished your first draft! Congratulations!

It's a wonderful accomplished feeling to finish the first draft.
Can't you hear the success bells ringing when any one asks, "How is your novel coming along?"  And you can answer. "Fine, I've finished the first draft."

Celebrate every goal reached!

So once I finish the first draft, it's time to go back through and add all the spit and polish, including great sun rises and sun sets if on a sailing vessel like I often spend time. 

Three vital questions I ask myself to begin editing after finishing the first draft: 

1) Do I need to add more scenes to reach my word count or       add more detail in scenes to make more vivid?

b) Am I staying in Deep POV and not head hopping? For my 4-Part series on DPOV click here for Part 1:  http://bit.ly/2EyAtdK.

c)  Am I using the five senses, strong verbs, strong adjectives?

Hey, thanks for stopping by. Hope this has helped you today.
I will go in much more detail about editing a first draft in Part 2 next week. Please leave a comment if this has helped and share on your social media by clicking on the icons below.

Blessings on your writing,
Elva Martin

Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels published with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. She has indie published a Bible study on Amazon, Power Over Satan, on the  believer's authority in Christ. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin    

 Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon:http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI

Guest Blog "Writers' Police Academy"

By Guest Blogger Fran Stickland Anderson

Writers' Police Academy - Crime and Suspense

Just arrived home from a conference for writers of suspense and police procedurals, the Writers’ Police Academy in Green Bay, Wisconsin. The academy is a hands-on opportunity for authors who want to experience for themselves the field of law enforcement with some firefighter, first responder, and sometimes a dive team thrown in for good measure. There won't be many pictures to prove my participation because photography and videos are not allowed in many of the classes  to protect those officers whose identity in undercover work might be compromised.

I did take the photo here of my husband and me in some tactical gear. David participated in a timed session of putting on and taking off the gear, which was cumbersome and heavier than expected and consisted of half pants, a bulletproof vest, and a weapon belt.

 I loaded and fired a Glock at an indoor range, participated in a simulated shooter incident training, learned the proper defense and arrest tactics of using a baton to gain control of a situation, sketched the face of a wanted criminal, watched a burn house demonstration, a dive team demonstration, and much more. My main observation was that my mind could learn just about anything, but my body reflexes were slow at getting the lesson. Not sure anyone there would want me as their partner on the street. Law enforcement training involves three areas of preparation: mental, physical and emotional, because all reflexes must work in tandem. Life and death decisions are made in nanoseconds.

As a writer, it is important to write as real as possible, even for a world of make believe. Readers learn a lot about the world around them when books accurately reflect life.

A well-written, well-researched story will convey an officer’s biological need to help others, his/her desire to fix other’s problems, the courage to take and maintain control of a situation, his inability to turn off the adrenaline produced from engaging in confrontational circumstances, and his persistent observation of the immediate world around him, unable to shut down that training even in his personal time.

The Academy’s trainers consisted of actual police officers, detectives, a forensic artist, a former undercover agent, a former prosecutor, martial arts expert, interrogation expert, representatives from SIRCHIE, manufacturer of investigative-related solutions, and much more. My husband (he’s a writer too) and I were up at 5:30, at breakfast by 6:30 and on the bus by 7:15. We rode to an international police training facility and participated in classes from testifying in a court of law and the world of undercover to hands-on physical training and microscopic murder weapons. Between 4:00 and 4:30 we boarded the buses back to the hotel where we attended another class between 4:30 and 6:00. Each evening between 8:00 and 10:00 the entire group would gather for one more session.

We met many accomplished authors, learned more than we will ever be able to retain, and arrived at the end of each long day thoroughly exhausted. To close the conference Saturday evening, Jeffrey Deaver, the keynote speaker, who also attended the academy classes along with the rest of us, encouraged us by sharing the early publishing struggles of now-famous and prolific writers.

I would encourage anyone who is serious about writing material that contains elements of law enforcement to attend the annual Writers’ Police Academy to help authenticate their manuscript. Getting the details right makes for a more believable read.

Getting the correct details of any situation in life is important as well before making a judgement (which can be considered merely an opinion or a sensible conclusion according to Oxford Dictionaries).

I always like to leave you with an encouraging word from the one book that has it all, romance, intrigue, murder, deception, crime, and investigative wisdom….the Bible.

“…then you shall investigate and search out and inquire thoroughly.”
                                                  ***
HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS GUEST BLOG by Fran. If so, please do share by clicking on the small icons below.

Blessings,
Elva Marttin
Fran Strickland Anderson

Fran Strickland Anderson is president of the ACFW South Carolina Chapter and is also a member of the Foothills Writer’s Guild and Blue Ridge Writers. She is a contributor to several of the Moments series books published by Grace Publishing and the First Draft Society’s Inklings series. Her current work-in-progress is a redemptive suspense novel entitled Roots That Run Deep. Fran is married to David, is mother of Jake, and resides in upstate South Carolina where she works full time as an assistant city manager. Her blog, Scattering Words and Sowing Seeds (scatteringwordsandsowingseeds.blogspot.com), seeks to entertain, encourage, and inspire both writers and non-writers as they navigate life’s challenges. Most of her stories are still waiting to be told.

Scattering Words and Sowing Seeds

Sharing words that entertain, encourage and inspire!

Blog http://www.scatteringwordsandsowingseeds.blogspot.com

Twitter www.twitter.com/FranLStrickland

Facebook and Linked In Fran Strickland Anderson

The Birth of the U.S. Navy - For my novel research

by Elva Cobb Martin Today I am sharing a column by Bill Federer on The Birth of the U. S. Navy. This is part of my research for my historical romance series. Hope you enjoy! You can sign up for his email list. You may also like to order his wonderful book of answered prayers in the founding of America which is  shown below.

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American Minute with Bill Federer "AN APPEAL TO HEAVEN" - The birth of the U.S. Navy & Coast Guard

In June of 1775, citizens acting as merchant marinerscaptured the British schooner HMS Margaretta around Machias, Massachusetts (present-day Maine).

That same month, General George Washington, with the help of merchant ship owner Colonel John Glover of Marblehead, Massachusetts, chartered and outfitted several ships to interrupt the British supplies.

The marker at the base of John Glover's statue in Boston states: "John Glover of Marblehead - A Soldier of the Revolution. He commanded a regiment of one thousand men raised in that town known as the marine regiment, and enlisted to serve throughout the war. He joined the camp at Cambridge, June 22, 1775, and rendered distinguished service in transporting the army."

The first ships outfitted by Glover were named Hannah, Franklin, Warren, Hancock and Lee. They had crews of experienced fisherman who defended American ports and raided British ships carrying ammunition and supplies.

55 British ships were captured by this original American flotilla. One of these was then the Leecaptured the British brig HMS Nancyon November 29, 1775, with its cargo of 2,000 Brown Bess muskets, 100,000 flints, 30,000 of artillery ammunition, 30 tons of musket ammunition, and a 13 inch brass mortar. This was a tremendous benefit to the new Continental Army.

After the Battle of BrooklynHeights, August 27, 1776, John Glover and his Marblehead fisherman saved the day by evacuating Washington and the entire Continental Army, under cover of fog, in their miraculous escape across the East River to Manhattan Island.

Miracles in American History-32 Amazing Stories of Answered Prayers

Glover's large Durham rowboats also ferried Washington and the Continental Army across the ice packed Delaware River for the surprise attack on the German Hessian troops at the Battle of Trenton, December 26, 1776.

DVD Miracles in American History- (episodes 1-10)

The Continental Congress, on December 22, 1775, had authorized a Continental Navy,consisting of five ships, the Alfred, Columbus, Andrew Doria, and Cabot. It was put under the command of Esek Hopkins, Esq., and four captains, Dudley Saltonstall, Abraham Whipple, Nicholas Biddle and John Burrows Hopkins.

Congress also commissioned five first lieutenants, one of whom was the future naval hero, John Paul Jones.

American ships flew the Pine Tree Flag, designed by General Washington's secretary, Colonel Joseph Reed, who wrote in a letter, October 20, 1775: "... flag with a white ground and a tree in the middle, the motto AN APPEAL TO HEAVEN."

The Pine Tree Flag was also flown in towns, churches, riverbanks, and at the nation's capital in Philadelphia.

Eastern White Pine Trees grew to a height of over 150 feet and were ideal for use as masts on British ships.

These pines contributed to the British navy becoming the most powerful navy in the world.

In 1734, there was a Mast Tree Riot where men disguised as Indians chase away the King's surveyor. In 1772, New Hampshire had a Pine Tree Riot.

The King sent agents to enforce his claim to every tree in New England over 12 inches in diameter. In 1772, when the sheriff came to South Weare, New Hampshire, to arrest those who had cut down some of King's trees, 30 men busted into the sheriff's room at the inn at night, with their faces blackened with soot in disguise, and beat the sheriff sore with switches made from pine branches. The men were later arrested and forced to pay a fine. It was a test of the King's authority and considered by some as the beginnings of the revolution.

The Pine Tree Flag's phrase, "An Appeal to Heaven," was first used by John Locke in his Second Treatise on Civil Government, 1690, regarding the right of citizens who have been denied justice to go above the king's head: "Where the body of the people ... is deprived of their right ... and have no appeal on earth, then they have a liberty to appeal to heaven ... Where there lies no appeal on earth ... they have just cause to make their appeal to heaven ... Where there is no judicature (justice) on earth, to decide controversies amongst men, God in heaven is judge.He alone, it is true, is judge of the right ... So in this ... he should appeal to the Supreme Judge."

Patrick Henry stated at the Second Virginia Convention, March 23, 1775: "An appeal to arms and to the God of hosts is all that is left us! ... We shall not fight our battles alone. There is a just God who presides over the destinies of nations."

Massachusetts Provincial Congress stated April 26, 1775, following the Battles of Lexington and Concord: "Appealing to Heaven for the justice of our cause, we determine to die or be free."

The Massachusetts Navy flew a similar Liberty Tree Flag, with the line "An Appeal to God."

The Declaration of Causes and Necessity for Taking Up Arms, July 6, 1775, stated: "We most solemnly, before God and the world ... resolved to die freemen rather than to live slaves ... With an humble confidence in the mercies of the Supreme and Impartial Judge and Ruler of the Universe."

The Declaration of Independence, July 4, 1776, stated: "We, therefore ... appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do ... declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States."

America's first navy grew to over 40 vessels, but was disbanded after the Revolutionary War. The Massachusetts Navy continued, and was later incorporated into the U.S. Navy.

DVD Miracles in American History- (episodes 1-10)

On AUGUST 4, 1790, the Revenue Marine, later called Revenue Cutter Service, was created by the recommendation of Alexander Hamilton,the Secretary of the Treasury. It consisted of 10 ships charged with stopping smuggling and French privateers from operating in American waters.                                                  *** Thanks for stopping by. Would love to hear your comments. Please share on social media by clicking on the small icons below. Elva Martin Elva Cobb Martin is vice-president of the South Carolina Chapter of American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a former school teacher and a graduate of Anderson University and Erskine College. She has two inspirational novels published with Lighthouse Publishers of the Carolinas. Summer of Deception, a contemporary romantic suspense, and an historical romance, In a Pirate’s Debt. Both have spent time on Amazon’s 100 Best Sellers List for Women’s Religious Fiction. She has indie published a Bible study on Amazon, Power Over Satan, on the  believer's authority in Christ. Decision, Charisma, and Home Life have carried Elva's articles. Jim Hart of Hartline Literary represents her. She and her husband Dwayne are semi-retired ministers. A mother and grandmother, Elva lives in South Carolina. Connect with her on her web site http://www.elvamartin.com,on Twitter www.twitter.com/ElvaCobbMartin; Facebook http://www.facebook.com/elvacobbmartin;  and Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/elvacobbmartin      Link to her romance novels and non-fiction works on Amazon:http://amzn.to/2pOgVHI